My story so far part 9: The reason

As time went by, many aspects came back.
They weren't all related to past lives, but it seems that there were a lot of wounds left behind.
I’m going to write in this chapter what I know about the aspects, so one can understand the reason why I mentioned them and their role in my journey.

What is an aspect? It is a part of yourself, a role that you as a being created.
We all create aspects, roles that we play in our lives: We have a role as part of the family we were born in, a role related to our job, one related to our social status, to the relationship status and so on.
We create and play hundreds of such roles during a lifetime, from the most unimportant ones to the ones who define us, or so we think.

The problem occurred when we forgot who we really are, and started identifying ourselves with the roles, or aspects, that we were playing. And that happened many lifetimes ago !
These aspects you created begin to have a will of their own which they use upon your mind, where they fight for gaining energy, if you are unaware.

How many times have you not felt that you are unworthy, or not good enough or heard a voice that was telling you that you are inferior to others?
Or perhaps a voice that paralyzed you with fear regarding a certain subject that is delicate for You?
These are all aspects, and although the physical body dies, they remain alive in a state of consciousness and transfer from one life to another, depending on the respective being.

Why did the aspects come back to me this life, when I was a completely different person? Because I made a choice before I was born in this lifetime.
I made a choice that this life I am going to end the circle, and I am going to live as an awakened being.
These wounded and hurt past-life aspects feel that there is the time to come home.
They still existed somewhere deep inside me, in a corner of my consciousness.

When they are willing to come back and seek resolution, they bring you their energy with them.
After you integrate them, you can use that energy who is now available to you to create the life that you want.
They will test you and see if you are for real, if you really want to live as a conscious being.
They seek light, they seek resolution, but also they will oppose resistance, because in a way, once they come back, they die as an identity.
They will still try and control your mind, and gain energy through that.

This is exactly what happened for me the following months and years.
I felt the aspects in my mind and tried to argue with them, fight them and so on.
The only thing that works is to know who you really are and not give away your energy to them, not try to fight mentally with them or convince them through your mind, because you will only lose that way.

It's not easy because you feel them inside, you feel their energy, but once you make a clear choice, from the heart, the power to get past them will show up from inside of you.
You are their creator, so no inner voice, feeling, role, aspect is stronger than You !

Back to my story, after each aspect I integrated I felt more and more connected to my soul.
I began to feel a beauty inside me, a peace that I only felt as a child.
I began to trust myself, my choices and also to understand that everything happens for a very good reason and in a perfect order.

I’m saying that not as a mental statement, but as a feeling and a truth inside me.
I have learned a lot about life from my past aspects also.
Every experience, every trauma is a way to bring you forward to the one big goal of your lives: To reunite yourself with your essence!

Duality is the way to achieve it, without duality you still remain in a primary state.
You are one with your essence, but you don't know it by experience.
You are like a child, who lives that state but is not aware of it.
Only through personal experience you come back to that primordial state, but not as a child, as a conscious being, aware of who he really is.

Before I jump to conclusions, I want to share with you another one of my past lives, because it is related to the first question i have asked, even before i started my spiritual journey:"Why do things happen that way?"